Holiday season for most is a time of laughter, fellowship, and sharing the gift of love. It’s a time when the stores are filled with decorations, holiday scents like cinnamon, and hearing the sounds of Christmas carols. For most, the holiday season is a time to make beautiful memories with loved ones to share in years to come.
However, while the holidays can be a time of happiness for most, it can bring up sadness for some. These feelings can come from a variety of reasons to include thoughts of past loss, unresolved grief, a sense of loneliness or increased isolation, the idea that everyone else around you is experiencing a more happy and fulfilled life than you, and/or the stress of financial hardship. Feelings of sadness can also be caused by Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), sometimes called winter depression or seasonal depression. SAD is a type of depression that is related to the change in the season, and occurs about the same time each year. Symptoms start in the fall and continue into the winter months, decreasing the individual’s energy and increasing moodiness. Research suggests that Seasonal Affective Disorder is more common in women, and the more north you go (ie. living in the state of New York vs Florida) there is a higher probability of someone being affected.
So what if you aren’t in the “cheery” holiday mood that surrounds you? What happens when you are filled with anxiety, stress, agitation, or feelings of depression? Listed below are some recommendations.
Acknowledge your feelings- Accept that you are grieving, stressed, feeling “down”. In order to implement the appropriate coping mechanisms you’ll need to acknowledge your feelings, accept them, and work to try to improve your mood. Know that it’s okay to not be in the “holiday spirit”, just don’t allow your feelings to consume you or cause any detriment to your life.
Express your feelings- Talk to a friend or relative about how you’re feeling. If you feel there is no one to talk to, journal your feelings. Don’t keep those feelings bottled up inside of you, it’s healthy to release them. Think of it as a cleansing, a self-care releasing of toxic feelings and thoughts.
Create new traditions- Sometimes with the holidays people are triggered by past thoughts, thoughts of loved ones, old traditions shared, etc. Do something different this year. Start a new tradition, one that you can enjoy for years to come.
Give the gift of giving- Help someone else. You can volunteer or donate to a local nonprofit or church. Helping others tend to make you feel better inside, knowing that you were able to put a smile on someone else’s face. Sometimes it’s easy for us to get caught up in our own world of issues, and not have empathy for someone who may be facing his/her own life struggles. It’s easy for us to consume our minds with everything that may be going wrong for us, when there is someone out there yearning for something as simple as a smile or a thank you. Take the time to find something kind to say to someone, give a compliment, or tell someone “I love you”. Be a light to someone else’s darkness.
Make a budget and stick to it- Don’t overdo it. Yes, the stores are filled with toys and sales, you want to try to “go all out” for the kids, the holiday parties, etc. However, if you ain’t got it, you ain’t got it. This is where creativity may come into play. For gifting ideas, try making some homemade gifts, or going to your local dollar store and make stocking stuffers. Going to a holiday party, wear something in your closet. Pull out that little black dress and accent it with some pretty accessories and some cute shoes!
Exercise- Research shows that exercise reduces stress and helps with your mood. Get some cardio in, try yoga, or pilates. You can go for a long walk, and at the same time get some needed sunlight.
Get some sunlight- Research has also shown that the right amount of sunlight can increase your mood. Without enough sunlight exposure, an individual’s serotonin levels can decrease. Serotonin is the hormone released from the brain that is related to helping with a more positive mood, as well as, helping with remaining calm and focused.
Gratitude- Try to place your energy into being grateful. Try not to focus on what you are lacking but on the positive flow in your life. Gratitude is the seed for abundance. “When you look at life through the eyes of gratitude, the world becomes a magical and amazing place”- Jennifer Gayle
Relax- Take a breather. Listen to some music, get a massage, read a new book, watch your favorite movie, or binge watch a tv show. Do something that will help you relax.
Seek professional help if you need it- I recommend seeing a local psychiatrist, therapist, doctor/medical professional for an assessment and/or possible treatment methods which may include medication and light therapy to help with improving your mood.
In summary, be mindful of your triggers, try your best to relax, use healthy coping skills, and practice a mindset of gratitude. Show yourself some compassion. Remembering that it’s the small things that are sometimes taken for granted that truly matter. The gift of giving, sharing love, being gifted with the breath of life, another day/opportunity to evolve and become a better version of ourselves than we were on the day before. If you’re feeling a sense of loneliness or sadness this holiday season, try some of the above recommendations/tips. Hopefully, you’ll find some peace and joy this holiday season.
